Diary Extract 24 May 27 1760

Tuesday May 27, 1760, I was affected in conversing with a friend about the distresses with which our church is at present oppressed. The love of many waxeth cold and some have said they will come no more amongst us. Deliver me, O Lord, from such a spirit. May I dwell in thy house to the end of my days. And may it be my constant aim by every means in my power to restore and confirm my lukewarm brethren and while I look upon these things as chastisements for sin, may I endeavour for myself to set about a reformation.

Diary Extract 23 May 25 and 26 1760

May 25 This day six persons were added to our number five of whom came from Leeds. In the evening we established a meeting at our house. May the Lord prosper our undertaking.

May 26 My sins have this day been many and great. I have to complain of wandering thoughts and negligence in private prayer, unreasonable anger and too much levity. In the evening I had much pleasure in reading Clarke's Bible and was blessed with some desires after God and holiness.

Diary Extract 22 May 14 1760

May 14 This morning was set apart for fasting and prayer on account of the present distresses of our Zion. We met in the vestry a little after five in the morning and continued our meeting till nearly eight.

O Lord to thee I here confess

My folly sin and wretchedness

O may my few remaining days

Be all devoted to thy praise

Thy statutes may I keep in mind

Thy law upon my memory bind

These truths may every heart embrace

And praise thee for thy richer grace

Diary Extract 21 May 13 1760

May 13. This day I was much fatigued in body, but something better in mind than the day before. As I have now got a new house, my desire and prayer is that, being possessed of a new heart, I may be enabled, through grace, to perform new obedience. I had much pleasure in family prayer in the evening.

A house of prayer my house shall be,

A temple for my God;

Nor shall allow'd iniquity

Have place in my abode.

Lord help me to perform this resolution!

Extract 20 May 12 1760

May 12, 1760

We have this day been removing our goods to a house in Barker End, more airy and healthy than our former situation:- I desire to be thankful that he who fixes the bounds of our habitations has now brought me to the place where I desired to be. It has been a day of much hurry and toil, so that I have had but little thought about God and heavenly things.

Diary Extract 19 May 11 1760

Lord's Day, May 11

The earth resplendent Phœbus cheers,

And bright the morning light appears;

The fruitful ground, refresh'd with showers,

Unbosoms now the fairest flowers:

Far otherwise, alas! my mind,

To good averse, to ill inclined.

Diary Extract 18 May 4 1760

Lord's Day, May 4 O Lord God of heaven and earth! I come to thee this morning conscious of guiltI desire to acknowledge my transgressions;-I have been wasteful of my precious time; have neglected to examine myself; and have been chargeable with the omission of many other duties. O Lord, be merciful to me a sinner!'

I have this day been hearing what the desire of the righteous' is, and, 'that it shall be granted.'- Proverbs, x. 24. Let this be verified in my experience; and in order to this, may my desires be always such as thou dost approve. Set a watch before my mouth, and keep the door of my lips! Grant that, from this time, my mouth may be as a well of life, and that a stream of righteousness may flow from my lips into whatsoever company I am cast, and may my conduct preach righteousness to all with whom I have to do.

Mr Crabtree delivered his discourse with much energy and animation-but I have still reason to complain of the hardness of my heart. I must take up the lamentation 'My leanness, my leanness, woe is me! How can it be that I have an interest in these benefits, and yet be so unaffected with a sense of it? If it be so, 'why am I thus?' O Lord, who searchest all hearts, thou knowest that I would not deceive myself; I would not pretend to be brought nigh to that from which I am still at the greatest distance. - Thou knowest that my soul longs above all things after what thy servant has this day dwelt upon.